I'll start by saying Ryan's recent enrollment in Kindergarten has given me several hours of respite from his constant "What ifs" and "Whys". However, the minute he steps foot off the bus his little mouth starts moving and I'm hammered with questions like, "What would happen if you got chased by a bear, bit by a snake, sprayed by a skunk, and then kicked by a deer?" Last night when I was working on dinner he walked in and started, "Umm Mommy" I sighed and wearily replied, "Yes?" Upon hearing the impatience in my voice the smile on his little face dropped, he looked down at the ground and said, "I know I talk too much. I just have so many questions. There are so many things I want to know that I just don't know." I was immediately overwhelmed with guilt. I knelt down next to him, put my hand on his cheek and said, "Baby you can ask me anything you want." His smile returned and he asked, "What would happen if a W ate three other letters?" I closed my eyes and made a face. He giggled and said, "I know Ws can't eat anything because they're not alive. But why are they not alive? Why is it called W?" I couldn't help but sigh.
The other day I didn't get around to doing anything with my hair until after the kids got home. Salem came into my room to ask about something. When she saw I was doing my hair she got this weird look on her face and asked, "Where are you going?" I told her I wasn't going anywhere. She scrunched up her face and asked, "Then why are you doing your hair?" I said that I wanted to look nice before Jeff got home. As I was turning the blow dryer back on she shook her head and mumbled something to herself. I thought surely I misheard her and called out, "What did you say?" She didn't respond so I called out a little louder (but not yelling), "What did you say?" and chased her down. When she turned to looked at me I asked her again. She shrugged and replied, "That's kinda dumb." I raised my eyebrows but before I could say anything she snickered and said, "I'm sorry but I just think it's dumb. You don't need to do your hair if your not going anywhere. Daddy doesn't care." I just shook my head and said, "Oh but he does and so do I. Just you wait little girl one day you'll understand."
A couple of years ago my mom noticed that older men had started checking her out. I caught it happening once in the grocery store and teased her about it quite mercilessly. Today she sent me this email it was titled Rude Awakening:
I had a reality check this morning (felt more like a rude awakening). I was at the McDonald's driveup window, had asked for a small coffee ... when I went to pay, the guy looks at me and asks if it was a "regular" small or a "senior" small!!! The difference is the price and he wanted to make he didn't over charge me. Bless his heart.
It's okay. I wasn't offended. I just figure he's not very intelligent so I prayed for him.
My poor mom.
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